Reasons why Michael Richards should be grateful today

Not even a week ago, actor Michael Richards of Seinfeld fame ruined his good name and his career by launching off into a four minute racial tirade worthy of Mark Fuhrman or Bull Connor. He has rightfully been condemned by people of all races for what seemed to be an outpouring from the heart of rage toward African Americans, a rant which was immediately directed against two black club patrons (who denied that they were even heckling him). Even after such a bad week, Mr. Richards still has a lot to be grateful for. In case he is having trouble counting his blessings after such a rough week, I will attempt to help him out.

• He should be grateful that the crowd was too shocked and surprised, not to mention civilized, to react to his tirade in a more unfortunate manner. A different crowd might have pulled him off the stage and he might have been giving his Letterman "apology" from a recovery unit at a local hospital.
• He should be grateful that he's not the only high profile person to attack an entire race while in a state of rage. The shock of Mel Gibson's outrageous comments probably softened the blow for Mr. Richards a bit. Come to think of it, I'm sure that Mr. Gibson is grateful today that Mr. Richards matched or eclipsed the hatefulness of his tirade against Jewish people. Mr. Gibson is probably happy he's no longer the only high-profile Hollywood racist who has infuriated millions of people this year.
• Richards should be grateful that this truly is a nation that protects free speech. He will rightfully suffer career-threatening consequences for his Hitleresque tirade. However, he was not arrested. He was not fined. He even returned to the same stage the very next night and was allowed to perform his routine again (this time without the talk about lynching, apparrently). In fact, if he chose, he could today walk onto the streets of Baltimore, Washington, Detroit or even New York and spout out the same hatred if he chose (by the way, Mr. Richards is also blessed in that even he is probably not crazy or out of control enough to take that option).
• "Kramer" should be grateful that, unlike most of us who need to work for a living, he has already earned such a fortune that he can live comfortably for the rest of his life even if he never works again. Most of us face the prospect that if we commit a major enough blunder, we will lose our jobs and struggle to get gainful employment again. But, Mr. Richards can give thanks for the fact that to him, it ultimately doesn't matter whether or not America or its African American citizens decide to forgive him or not. He can slide into retirement just as gracefully as he slid into Jerry's apartment door one way or the other.
• He should be grateful that this is a generally forgiving nation with a relatively short memory. The most heinous acts can often be put behind someone with the passage of a few years time, a few appearances on Larry King Live or a book that talks about the inner demons that drove one to commit an evil act. In the past few years, we've had a well-known Hollywood director who assaulted a child receiving an Oscar award and a standing ovation from the moral standard-bearers in tinseltown, the "heart of America" (he accepted in abstentia because he'd be arrested if he entered the country). We've had a high profile Senator who spoke longingly about a segregationist Presidential candidate being returned to power. To top it off, the incoming President Pro Tempore of the Senate is a former Klan recruiter. Ah ... the sound of redemption. So, Michael Richards has hope that eventually America will forget what he the actor really thinks and will accept whatever excuse he and his handlers find for his behavior. Most importantly, he has the realistic hope that sooner rather than later, someone famous will do something even more outrageous and make him look good by comparison. So, he truly has much to be thankful for.